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Resolving Difficulties In The Divorce Process: Don't Let The Same Problems That Plagued Your Marriage Derail Your Divorce

Couples divorce for any number of reasons. However, some reasons are commonly cited: communication failures, disagreements over money and the challenges of raising children.

Just as these factors can contribute to the end of a marriage, they can also influence the trajectory of a divorce. Because of this, it can be crucial to understand how to address these issues so that they don't cause unnecessary problems during your divorce.


People who don't communicate well - or at all - with each other can struggle to resolve conflicting positions during a divorce.

In order to deal with communication problems, it can be helpful to work with a divorce professional. If litigation is not the best option for your divorce process, a trained mediator can help you resolve divorce-related issues. A mediator can help you stay on topic, avoid negative conversations and focus on solutions. If you are represented by an attorney, they can also help. Depending upon the level of heat in your interactions with your spouse, it may also be prudent to limit communications to writings.


Fighting over money can be especially painful, and during a divorce, any matter related to money can become especially contentious. This is problematic, as so many of the details that should be addressed in divorce have to do with money --- both assets and debts.

Education is key. Work hard to understand how California law will affect the distribution of assets and debts in your case, and ask your lawyer or mediator questions about what you do not understand. Having this information is crucial in leveling the playing field and securing a fair settlement.

The Challenges Of Raising Children

Your children are probably the center of your life, and you want them to be happy. While you and your ex- (or soon-to-be ex) spouse may have very different opinions on what this means or how to make them happen, you can probably agree that they should be protected from any unnecessary pain as a result of the divorce. (Even the best divorce can be difficult for a child.)

This could mean that you agree to mediate your problems to avoid court. Or even if mediation is not right for your family, that you both commit to discussing divorce-related issues only when the children are not present. Prioritizing your kids' best interests during a divorce is a step that most parents can agree upon in theory, and if you and your ex-spouse can work together to achieve this, it can become an important basis for further cooperation.

Pushing Past The Problems To Find Solutions

These and other problems that may have plagued your marriage can certainly affect your divorce. However, with support, legal guidance and a focus on your family, you can deal with these problems so that they don't derail your future. For couples that can learn the skill of working together to resolve the legal relationship of marriage, there are significant positive benefits as they move on as co-parents.

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Evans Family Law
5150 E Pacific Coast Hwy
STE 200
Long Beach, CA 90804-3399

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